Archives for posts with tag: love

I didn’t know I was going to do an article on love so close to Valentine’s Day, and I must say it actually isn’t on purpose.  But I believe I tune into the group consciousness when writing these articles, and what is on the group “mind”.  So, of course, different insights have come through this week about love…specifically love in relationship. And oh, I feel the fire this article may bring up in people.  If that happens, then please see this as a means for something to clear.  Of course, these are my thoughts and feelings and I own them as that. Whatever resonates, take it with you, and what doesn’t, discard.

When we begin to open our heart deeper and deeper to love someone, I believe there are different phases.  There is phase one, where we must get past obvious fears of the human condition: fear of abandonment, trust issues, and vulnerability.  When we stay present with what comes up with our loved ones, and continue to examine, “where is what is happening about me and my wounds?”, we make it through phase one with flying colors!

Phase 2 is peace. It is where all is well and many things have been sorted out.  It is balance and the calm after the storm.  It is a period where you reap the benefits of healed wounds through the love of your beloved and the self.

Just when you think you have it figured out, phase 3 comes along.  Phase 3 are the hidden places where fear resides.  It is the places you didn’t know existed and it may cause people to mistake this for “something not being right”.  I see many clients come to me in this phase where they think the person they are with, is missing certain aspects they like in a partner, or they decide when they finally have what they want, now they want their freedom, and the list goes on and on. It is the phase of dissatisfaction.  If you make it through this phase, it is hopefully because you see that everything you desire in someone else, is what you are desiring within yourself to achieve. Either that or you are tolerating and not enjoying your experience.

Many partners (especially female) will desire to be taken care of more financially.  They will feel frustrated about struggling in this way and make it about their partner.  When you ask yourself the question, “do you feel financially free personally?” and the answer is no, then it means it is time for you to dig deep and cultivate your gifts to bring abundance into your life.

Phase 3 is also about seeing the deep core feeling that many of us on this planet have about not being lovable enough to be worthy of having someone stay for a lifetime. We make it about the other person, so that we do not have to look deep within our own fears of not being enough.  We make problems up about the other people so we do not have to face the deep feeling of core unworthiness of Source/ God’s love. This fear is covert and not obvious. It will show up in the form of feeling “trapped” or feeling like you are drawn to something else. Many people end up cheating in this phase or asking for my favorite in the new age community: the open relationship.  Oooh, I know I am stirring the pot mentioning this one.

The open relationship works for some, but in my counseling of 100’s of people and over 1000 sessions, those in open relationship usually cease to survive them.  There are the rare few that utilize them to truly understand unconditional love and letting go of ownership paradigms, but most truly go into them from deep fear of true intimacy and even a history of sexual abuse.  I can honestly say that 99% of people I have worked with that choose the open relationship have had sexual abuse.  Why is this?

It is because being sexualized at a young age brings about a feeling of confusion of lovability equaling those that give them sexual affection.  This means there is a constant feeling of wanting to be engaged in constant stimulation from people to feel loved.  When true intimacy hits, meaning the real crap comes up, that is when suddenly they long for someone else.  Intimacy in their lives started out without boundaries, without safety, even if it was enjoyable for them. This is very confusing when developing sexuality.

So I share this all because I see how common failed love affairs are, I see how easy it is to give up, and I see how many people in the name of 5D reality shun away from committed, lifelong partnership.  I call in for all who struggle with these things a healing today even if it is not for lifelong partnership, and simply to feel deep love and connection.    I summon the beings of light that is YOU  and I, and the beings that watch over this planet to impulse the violet flame through any nook and cranny that any of us as a group consciousness holds within our vibration related to this, and then I ask it to spread around Earth now.  I call this in so in our own perfect way, we may have a clearing to experience true intimacy with others, whether it be sexual in nature or not.  I summon this so we may transcend the pain of our planets past miscreations and become victorious in the name of love.  I summon this so that we may speak to people we meet with authenticity and acceptance even if just meeting for a short conversation; I command this to be so, so we may not hide under the shroud of fear of not being worthy of love and acceptance.  We are ONE.

And so it is.

Ariah Velasquez

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Yes, love is mystical.  It is an alchemical process between source, spirit, and the heart.  It is who we are, and all that is.  How beings get to love in physical form has a majickal quality to it, because it is nothing that can be touched, this knowing and feeling of love.  It just is.

Realizing your own oneness can help with your ability to love.  As your soul heals, your brain heals,  and thus you begin to experience more and more this state of oneness.  You begin to break through the blocks that the brain has had from experiencing the true nature of reality.  The more you become merged with all things, the less your heart is closed.  You see, as you begin to feel the true connection to all things, it is impossible to hide and shield the heart.  The heart becomes free of the illusion of walls, as the body and spirit becomes free of them to.  The heart begins to merge with all that is, including your partners spiritual self.  With this merge, comes understanding the truth of who your partner is, and therefore the most profound experience of compassion you could  ever know. If you are merged with all that they are, how could you not see they come from love and light?  All the little things they do melt away more quickly, even though, your ego and mind may react or dislike aspects of their actions or personality.  It is your personality that judges something is good or bad, not your divine self that lies in the state of oneness.

A client asked me once how the latter could be true when she knows in her heart killing or causing someone harm is “bad”.  Here is the distinction: actions hold a frequency.  As you evolve, your desire to experience certain frequencies changes.  So it is not about one being bad or good.  Essentially all stems from God, because God is in everything.  Every experience is merely that: an experience.  So when you have decided something is bad, it means you no longer need to experience harming or the frequency of karma and pain on that level.  It is our higher selves wish that we all reach that place now as soon as possible, and yet, as beings birthed from all that is, from source, from God, we are given free will because Source has

allowed us to experience free will even though we are a part of the whole.  It is when we surrender to divine will that we know we are reaching a spiritual consciousness that is merging closer and closer back to where we came from: the divine source which is light.

The more we return to that essential source, the easier we can be conduits and receivers of love.  We are free of the blocks that make us feel seperate and therefore we don’t NEED anything from another. We just need them to be.  Of course, they might have personality traits that match our personality traits, but beyond personality, unconditional love lives, and it is in this that relationships may thrive.

This is an excerpt from Ariah Velasquez’ upcoming book release:  Love Lives: A guide to a successful relationship through communication, spirituality, and empathy.

We are one. http://www.blissfullifecounseling.info/ariah-s-healing-blog

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